Days of Countless Sorrow

Sometimes I find myself thinking about the various emotions I have encountered in my life in the past year, especially these last couple months. Not from a neurotic viewpoint but more as a bystander observing the process. I know about the stages of grief and how every person experiences them differently, but that is not where my thoughts lie.

People seem to think that sorrow is a fragile emotion but I’ve found it to be anything but frail and brittle. It is a thick, stifling rage full of betrayal and guilt; a deep, hollow ache that steals hope. It turns you into a liar…to your friends, your family and yourself; outwardly you’re “doing fine” when really that voice in your head is screaming. It’s the hand that pushes you under every time you come up for air. It’s every dark thought you’re afraid to have and every dream that is no longer. You wish it would numb the pain but instead it brings it into sharp focus, demanding attention like the burning sting of lemon juice in paper cut.

There is nothing delicate about sorrow. Sorrow is the albatross of remembrance.

This entry was posted on Friday, May 9, 2008; 7:01 pm at 07:01 and is filed under Sadness, Life. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response or trackback from your own site.